The book divided public opinion, as it was viewed by some as empowering women to take control of their dating lives, while others saw it as promoting manipulative and outdated gender roles.

 The book's authors, Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, advised women to follow strict dating rules, such as not calling or texting first and always letting the man make the first move. 

Despite the controversy, the book became a bestseller and inspired a series of sequels and spin-offs.

Critics lambasted The Rules that seemed like antiquated advice even 30 years ago: don't talk to a man first; don't ask him to dance and always end the date first.

Others said the book encouraged women to 'toy' with men and manipulate them, advising 'don't call him and rarely return his calls' and 'don't meet him halfway or go Dutch on a date'. Yet it was an instant bestseller, shifting four million copies in 27 languages and capturing the popular imagination.

The Rules prompted references on TV's Sex And The City and screaming debates on Oprah. 

Beyonce admitted it 'worked for me', while actress Blake Lively apparently used The Rules to snare Leonardo DiCaprio (they dated for five months). When Princess Diana was linked to rugby player Will Carling, his then wife Julia made headlines by offering on live TV to send her the book (Rule 23: Don't date a married man). Meghan Markle was reported to have studied the book and put it into practice (more of which later).

Now, authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider are back with a new, updated guide, The Rules Handbook. And it's more controversial than ever.

If the original Rules were about 'capturing his heart', today Sherrie and Ellen, 63 and 65, are advising on how to keep a man happy and committed in a long-term relationship, too.

Beware: the new guide may send your blood pressure soaring. Take this example. 'When your husband says something stupid, say nothing back. Two wrongs don't make a right. Practise silence!'

Or: 'When you come home from work where you have a fancy title like senior VP of corporate marketing and investor relations and run a staff of 50 people, switch from masculine to feminine mode. Set the table and cook dinner, and ask him nicely to help clean up!'

Or this: 'Just like dating isn't 100 per cent equal (the guy has to pursue you and propose), marriage isn't always either. [You must] both agree your husband/partner is the decision maker and you are his key supportive team member... even if you make more money.

'That's because romantic relationships are based on biology, not finance. There's a hierarchy that goes back to caveman days. If you act too bossy or overbearing, you will emasculate your husband and your marriage will suffer, so let him take the lead role.'

Does such advice really have a place in the 21st century?

'We're making it like he's the senior partner and you're the junior partner,' Sherrie explains. 'Sometimes, you'll be senior like if it's a kids' issue, or if you're better with money or better with organising.

'But we're saying, in general, men are born leaders. This is biological. It's based on our experience and that of our clients, and biology states that men are born to lead and women are more the nurturers, even though they're in powerful positions in their work life.'

She cites the example of Eileen Ford, who co-founded the famous Ford Models agency with husband Jerry. 'When we interviewed her, she said: "When I walk through the front door, Jerry's the boss."'

'That's how you have to make a man feel. You can say it's controversial, it's awful, but that's the reality. A lot of people say it shouldn't be that way, but that's a lot of magical, wishful thinking.' She adds: 'You have to be feminine even if you're a CEO because no man wants to be with a woman who behaves like a man.'

Though many will find the gender roles here old-fashioned, others would argue that the 'traditional' marriage is far from dead. On social media platforms such as TikTok, the 'trad wife' movement is trending among young women.

Speaking on Zoom from homes in New Jersey and New York state's Long Island, Sherrie and Ellen still sport the long, straight hair they championed for Rules Girls in their original book (men prefer it, apparently).

As well as writing books, they offer personalised advice in person or over the phone — a 15-minute consultation costs $150 (£120). A six-hour package will set you back $1,500 (£1,200).

'We also do makeovers,' says Sherrie. 'A lot of women don't know how to dress for a date — they look like Diane Keaton with the turtlenecks and short hair and slacks. For clients in their 20s, 30s and 40s, we tell them mini skirts.'

In some ways The Rules for marriage are directly opposed to the 1995 Rules for dating and 'snaring' a man. Where the latter emphasise 'being hard to get', the former prioritise above all else 'being easy to live with'. Even when he's not.

'If you're not married,' Sherrie tells me, 'maybe you'll find that shocking, but if you are married, you'll know exactly what we're talking about. The self-control that was used to date him is now used to keep him.'

Can they define what makes a husband happy? 'Every husband we know loves food and loves to be fed,' says Sherrie, 'so make sure they're fed and keep your refrigerator stocked. Go out to dinner if they want to. And obviously, intimacy is important to men, most men. Just be cordial and kind.'

Should a wife say yes to sex, even if she's not up for it?

'You should try to,' says Ellen, 'but you don't have to say yes if you're not in the mood.'

Sherrie adds: 'I think with intimacy what we say in the book is that you're not always in the mood to do other things. I'm not always in the mood to exercise, but on some level, it's less work to just do it than to fight it, you know!'

'Every couple is different but most women are not as into it as men. So, getting meals, having intimacy, being a family, going on family vacations, these are all important.'

Then something unexpected happens. Ellen suddenly announces she's not in the mood for this interview. 'I don't really want to be quoted talking about sex,' she says. 'I'm uncomfortable. I never talk about sex.'

But 'intimacy' is discussed often in the book?

'I think Sherrie's doing a great job,' she says, 'so I think I'm going to hang up.' And… she's gone.

Ellen, it transpires, has just 'had some dental work done', leaving Sherrie to explain some of the book's more eyebrow-raising assertions.

'Intimacy and cooking are to men what snuggling is to women,' reads the tip titled Make Time For Intimacy, for example. 'One benefit of a Rules Marriage is that your husband finds you attractive and loves your cooking, so be flattered. Try to put yourself in the mood because it's not about feeling it all the time, but doing it. Physical intimacy leads to emotional intimacy. Everyone wins!'

It's hard to see how women can win if they're constantly putting themselves last, demoting their needs, prioritising his. Frankly, that sounds more like a recipe for marriage-killing resentment.

Women, they write, should in no way attempt to control or change a man. 'A woman really can't tell a man what to do in the same way a man can tell a woman what to do, even though it doesn't sound politically correct,' says Sherrie, who seems unfazed by Ellen's exit. She cites the rather unrepresentative example of Michelle Obama, who didn't want Barack to run for president. The wives who don't give in get divorced.

Apple Flies 600 Tons of iPhones to U.S. to Beat Tariffs

Apple rushed 1.5M iPhones from India to avoid Trump's 125% China tariffs, using cargo flights and fast-tracked customs in Chennai.

Beauty Queen Güler Erdoğan Dies in Bridge Fall at 27

Miss Europe-Kosovo Güler Erdoğan died after falling 50ft from a bridge while allegedly fleeing police following a night out in Turkey.

TikToker Kaitlyn Jenkins Wakes Up From Surgery Handcuffed

TikToker Kaitlyn Jenkins woke up from surgery restrained and unable to speak, sparking outrage over patient rights and post-surgical care.

Influencer Valeria Mireles, known as ‘Miss Rodeo,' dies at 20

Influencer Valeria Mireles, known as "Miss Rodeo," tragically died at age 20 following a car crash in Nuevo León, Mexico, leaving loved ones in mourning.

The book divided public opinion, as it was viewed by some as empowering women to take control of their dating lives, while others saw it as promoting manipulative and outdated gender roles.

 The book's authors, Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, advised women to follow strict dating rules, such as not calling or texting first and always letting the man make the first move. 

Despite the controversy, the book became a bestseller and inspired a series of sequels and spin-offs.

Critics lambasted The Rules that seemed like antiquated advice even 30 years ago: don't talk to a man first; don't ask him to dance and always end the date first.

Others said the book encouraged women to 'toy' with men and manipulate them, advising 'don't call him and rarely return his calls' and 'don't meet him halfway or go Dutch on a date'. Yet it was an instant bestseller, shifting four million copies in 27 languages and capturing the popular imagination.

The Rules prompted references on TV's Sex And The City and screaming debates on Oprah. 

Beyonce admitted it 'worked for me', while actress Blake Lively apparently used The Rules to snare Leonardo DiCaprio (they dated for five months). When Princess Diana was linked to rugby player Will Carling, his then wife Julia made headlines by offering on live TV to send her the book (Rule 23: Don't date a married man). Meghan Markle was reported to have studied the book and put it into practice (more of which later).

Now, authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider are back with a new, updated guide, The Rules Handbook. And it's more controversial than ever.

If the original Rules were about 'capturing his heart', today Sherrie and Ellen, 63 and 65, are advising on how to keep a man happy and committed in a long-term relationship, too.

Beware: the new guide may send your blood pressure soaring. Take this example. 'When your husband says something stupid, say nothing back. Two wrongs don't make a right. Practise silence!'

Or: 'When you come home from work where you have a fancy title like senior VP of corporate marketing and investor relations and run a staff of 50 people, switch from masculine to feminine mode. Set the table and cook dinner, and ask him nicely to help clean up!'

Or this: 'Just like dating isn't 100 per cent equal (the guy has to pursue you and propose), marriage isn't always either. [You must] both agree your husband/partner is the decision maker and you are his key supportive team member... even if you make more money.

'That's because romantic relationships are based on biology, not finance. There's a hierarchy that goes back to caveman days. If you act too bossy or overbearing, you will emasculate your husband and your marriage will suffer, so let him take the lead role.'

Does such advice really have a place in the 21st century?

'We're making it like he's the senior partner and you're the junior partner,' Sherrie explains. 'Sometimes, you'll be senior like if it's a kids' issue, or if you're better with money or better with organising.

'But we're saying, in general, men are born leaders. This is biological. It's based on our experience and that of our clients, and biology states that men are born to lead and women are more the nurturers, even though they're in powerful positions in their work life.'

She cites the example of Eileen Ford, who co-founded the famous Ford Models agency with husband Jerry. 'When we interviewed her, she said: "When I walk through the front door, Jerry's the boss."'

'That's how you have to make a man feel. You can say it's controversial, it's awful, but that's the reality. A lot of people say it shouldn't be that way, but that's a lot of magical, wishful thinking.' She adds: 'You have to be feminine even if you're a CEO because no man wants to be with a woman who behaves like a man.'

Though many will find the gender roles here old-fashioned, others would argue that the 'traditional' marriage is far from dead. On social media platforms such as TikTok, the 'trad wife' movement is trending among young women.

Speaking on Zoom from homes in New Jersey and New York state's Long Island, Sherrie and Ellen still sport the long, straight hair they championed for Rules Girls in their original book (men prefer it, apparently).

As well as writing books, they offer personalised advice in person or over the phone — a 15-minute consultation costs $150 (£120). A six-hour package will set you back $1,500 (£1,200).

'We also do makeovers,' says Sherrie. 'A lot of women don't know how to dress for a date — they look like Diane Keaton with the turtlenecks and short hair and slacks. For clients in their 20s, 30s and 40s, we tell them mini skirts.'

In some ways The Rules for marriage are directly opposed to the 1995 Rules for dating and 'snaring' a man. Where the latter emphasise 'being hard to get', the former prioritise above all else 'being easy to live with'. Even when he's not.

'If you're not married,' Sherrie tells me, 'maybe you'll find that shocking, but if you are married, you'll know exactly what we're talking about. The self-control that was used to date him is now used to keep him.'

Can they define what makes a husband happy? 'Every husband we know loves food and loves to be fed,' says Sherrie, 'so make sure they're fed and keep your refrigerator stocked. Go out to dinner if they want to. And obviously, intimacy is important to men, most men. Just be cordial and kind.'

Should a wife say yes to sex, even if she's not up for it?

'You should try to,' says Ellen, 'but you don't have to say yes if you're not in the mood.'

Sherrie adds: 'I think with intimacy what we say in the book is that you're not always in the mood to do other things. I'm not always in the mood to exercise, but on some level, it's less work to just do it than to fight it, you know!'

'Every couple is different but most women are not as into it as men. So, getting meals, having intimacy, being a family, going on family vacations, these are all important.'

Then something unexpected happens. Ellen suddenly announces she's not in the mood for this interview. 'I don't really want to be quoted talking about sex,' she says. 'I'm uncomfortable. I never talk about sex.'

But 'intimacy' is discussed often in the book?

'I think Sherrie's doing a great job,' she says, 'so I think I'm going to hang up.' And… she's gone.

Ellen, it transpires, has just 'had some dental work done', leaving Sherrie to explain some of the book's more eyebrow-raising assertions.

'Intimacy and cooking are to men what snuggling is to women,' reads the tip titled Make Time For Intimacy, for example. 'One benefit of a Rules Marriage is that your husband finds you attractive and loves your cooking, so be flattered. Try to put yourself in the mood because it's not about feeling it all the time, but doing it. Physical intimacy leads to emotional intimacy. Everyone wins!'

It's hard to see how women can win if they're constantly putting themselves last, demoting their needs, prioritising his. Frankly, that sounds more like a recipe for marriage-killing resentment.

Women, they write, should in no way attempt to control or change a man. 'A woman really can't tell a man what to do in the same way a man can tell a woman what to do, even though it doesn't sound politically correct,' says Sherrie, who seems unfazed by Ellen's exit. She cites the rather unrepresentative example of Michelle Obama, who didn't want Barack to run for president. The wives who don't give in get divorced.