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Kaitlyn Dever Opens Up on Grief and Role in The Last Of Us

Kaitlyn Dever Opens Up on Grief and Role in The Last Of Us
Published 3 weeks ago on May 26, 2025

The Last Of Us Star Kaitlyn Dever Opens Up About Grief and How Andrew Garfield Helped Her Heal.

Kaitlyn Dever, known for her roles in Bad Teacher, Booksmart, and the gripping TV drama Dopesick, has recently taken on a powerful and emotionally charged role in the acclaimed HBO series The Last Of Us. Now 28, Dever portrays Abby Anderson, a determined soldier on a quest to avenge her father’s death, in the post-apocalyptic drama that stars Pedro Pascal and Bella Ramsey.

What many viewers don’t realize is that the opening scenes of Dever’s character recalling her father’s death carried a personal weight for the actress. Remarkably, Kaitlyn delivered those heart-wrenching lines just three days after the devastating loss of her own mother, Kathy Dever, who passed away at 53 after battling metastatic breast cancer for 14 years.

In an intimate interview with GQ Hype, Kaitlyn shared the emotional toll of performing such raw scenes amidst her own grief. "I had just experienced [that]," she revealed. "Even though death is part of the human experience, we are not meant to be used to grief and watching your best friend die. So that was a crazy line to repeat over and over again because I had just seen her. She wasn’t alive anymore and I saw her body in the hospital."

Kaitlyn’s poignant reflection captures the unimaginable pain of losing a loved one. “Nothing will ever be as bad as that,” she confessed, expressing the depth of her loss.

The Last Of Us actress announced her mother’s passing publicly in February 2024 via Instagram. Kathy Dever, a former professional ice skating coach, was not only Kaitlyn’s mother but a guiding light in her life. The actress has since been navigating the difficult path of grief while advocating for a more compassionate approach to supporting those mourning a loss.

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“The people that lose someone actually want to be asked about the one that they lost,” Kaitlyn explained. “They really want you to ask as many questions. It’s actually going to make me feel like her presence and her spirit is still here, and it keeps her alive, you know, her essence, like by talking about her and sharing stories about her.”

Kaitlyn hopes her openness will provide comfort to others dealing with similar heartbreak. “I know that if I talk about it and share my experience, it may help someone else in their experience,” she added.

Throughout her mother’s long and courageous fight with breast cancer, Kaitlyn found an unexpected source of solace in fellow actor Andrew Garfield. Garfield had openly spoken about the loss of his own mother, Lynne Garfield, to pancreatic cancer in 2019 during an emotional interview on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. He shared that he hoped the grief would stay with him, calling it “the unexpressed love that I never got to tell her.”

Kaitlyn revealed how she often turned to Andrew’s heartfelt words online during her darkest moments. “I would Google it and watch it often, because I always felt like… the worst thing in my life that could happen was losing my best friend. And I always thought that I wouldn’t be able to go on. But then I’d look at Andrew and think, well, his life seems to be moving forwards.”

Kathy Dever is survived by her husband Tim Dever—best known as the voice of Barney the Dinosaur from 2000 to 2002—and their younger daughters Mady and Jane. Kaitlyn paid tribute to her mother shortly after her death with a heartfelt message on social media:

“Thank you for fighting so hard for us for so long. I am forever, forever grateful for the special time we got to spend with you, sweet mama. It will never be enough.”

She continued, “I will be broken forever without you and I don't know how I’ll go on. You were the greatest mom and wife anyone could ever, ever ask for. I’m grateful that you gave me Mady, Jane, and Dad. We’ll always have each other to lean on because of you.”

In her touching tribute, Kaitlyn described her mother as “sunshine” — someone who “warmed me when I needed it the most and made me smile whenever I was sad.”

“My mama. My life. My everything. I don’t even have the words. Nothing I’ll ever say will amount to the gifts you have given me in my life, the boundless joy you brought, the deep, endless, unconditional love you gave me and our family,” she wrote.

She reminisced about the simple moments they shared, saying, “Your love was everywhere. It was in the morning having coffee with you and shopping on The RealReal. It was sitting out by the pool eating watermelon (with salt on it of course) and listening to Willie Nelson. It was laying in your bed with you watching Seinfeld and listening to your infectious laugh as you recited every line from memory.”

Kaitlyn also recalled their playful bond: “It was making fun of each other, it was getting to tell you about my day, it was getting the best advice from you anyone would be so lucky to receive. It was going places with you, because no matter where we were, we were having fun and laughing.”

The actress’s raw honesty about grief and loss, combined with her commitment to honoring her mother’s memory, has touched many fans and brought a new level of depth to her role in The Last Of Us.

Kaitlyn Dever’s story is not just one of loss, but of resilience, love, and the healing power of connection—even through the darkest times.

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